Breakups suck, it’s difficult, it’s painful, it’s complicated, it’s an emotional roller coaster and you are left in pieces after a breakup. You might think that holding those pieces of memory and hoping of getting back together will be good for you, but you are wrong.
All those feelings and emotions that you are experiencing at the moment aren’t unusual. The pain and suffering of your loss seem like physical pain, and you are right. Our mind is so powerful that we can use our negative emotions to harm ourselves even further. Thoughts, emotions and feelings that you have a normal and accept them for what they are.
The best thing to do is to take your time with you choosing what to do. Collect your strengths and start feeling good about yourself before making a decision on what you are going to do next. You have to heal before making another deal. I am a strong believer that to love somebody you have to have enough love for yourself first. When having an emotional breakup is something that will knock down you a bit, you can build yourself up after the first impact. That is where affirmations come in place. They will give you the necessary strength and hope to move on.
What to Do Right Now After Breakup
As of right now, you don’t have a partner, you don’t go out, you don’t talk to each other or spend time with each other. Although I don’t want to remind you about your breakup, I do want to bring what you gained from that. The main benefit is that you now have disposable time and space available just for you. Use it. Do whatever you can to make sure that you are taking good care of yourself. Take the time to relax and enjoy the comfort of being alone. Allow yourself to enjoy your time alone.
Now there is time that can be devoted to nurturing your self esteem, and you can use it to bring yourself out of hopelessness. Always keep in mind that no matter what situation you are facing, you should try to look at the bright side of it. There is a song that says, “Always look on the bright side of life.”. Life throws punches at you, but should that stop you from being who you are? Being strong after a breakup can be daunting, but it is important for you to do it.
Make sure you take time to enjoy yourself as much as possible. Look in the mirror and be satisfied with what you see. I mean this in a literal sense as well. Increase your physical activity, get fitter, release endorphins. See this breakup as your chance to become the best version of yourself that you can be. Get into more social activities, and spend more time with your family and friends. You should enjoy the simple pleasures of life.
Take your Time After Breakup
I want to emphasize the fact that you had a life before you met your partner. It is likely that your partner made your life more enjoyable and made your experiences more fulfilling. Despite your breakup, you should not dwell on it too much. It is what it is. It may be that there is a reason that you do not know why it was happening. Maybe just maybe you don’t really need to know, don’t dig yourself a bigger hole by asking questions.
In spite of the fact that there is no way to predict when the pain of loss will go away, one day it will. As the saying goes time will heal all wounds, all you can do now is to use the time as best as you can. Try to think of it as a new chapter in your life. In time, the page will be turned and you will begin a new sentence in that chapter.
Take the time to cherish all those moments you had. Remember the times when you spent time together and had fun. Reflect on your own perspective about the whole relationship, and maybe you made the right choice by ending it in the way you did. Raise your self-esteem by learning from the experience. Learn what your strengths are and how you can use them. Develop new skills, find a hobby that you enjoy, and improve yourself for the better by learning new things. As much as you can, make use of the time that you have only for yourself.
Mindset is the Key
Having a hard time handling a loss can further deepen your feelings of sadness and sorrow after a breakup. In order to unlock your true potential, you need to be able to control your mind, and for that to happen, you must learn to control it. When you learn to do this, you will be able to change your life for the better. A skill that you have to learn is the ability to turn every negative emotion into a positive one. It could be your new superpower.
You have to practice it in order to develop this skill, it won’t happen overnight. Taking your self criticism and transforming it into your motivation is a very important skill for you to develop. When it comes to life situations, it is usually best to approach them as optimistically as possible rather than pessimistically. This can not only be beneficial to your mental health but also to your overall well being.
Affirmations After Breakup
Affirmations are powerful tools to help you improve your present state of mind. They can help you with any kind of difficulty that you may be facing, including breakups. It is likely that you have seen dozens of lists on various forms of affirmation. But let’s focus on you. Due to the fact that affirmations cannot take effect over night, you have to make them extremely specific to your situation.
What do I mean by that? In order to be truly effective, affirmations need to include these components. They should be positive, short, in present tense, up to a point. Now let’s dig deeper than that.
Positive – What do you want from your affirmation? Anxiety, stress, debt, uncertainty? No, you want exactly the opposite. So create affirmations that will sound and be positive in the long run. Think of the best and most positive outcome that you want and write it down.
Short – When you have the whole scenario written down trim it a bit. You don’t need all the details on how you are going to achieve, but you should focus on the key points. For example – I will get over my breakup when I start to treat myself better, I will go out more often, and meet new people. Should be transformed into – I treat myself. Simple as that, you already know how you will do it. You are just stating and affirming that you will do it.
Use present tense – This is the most important point to know. Our minds tend to be quite literal when it comes to pretty much everything. You are in a stressful social situation, and you just think that you are going to somehow embarrass yourself. By doing that you just become more anxious and stressed. In this example, your negative affirmation came true and your fear of being embarrassed just went up. So you know already how to do it. In our example of – I treat myself – is a statement that you are already doing it.
Stick to a point – This can be tricky sometimes, so take your time when writing your affirmations. If you have a complex problem or situation that needs to be addressed and you can’t simplify it like in our example, then just separate the problem in sections. Affirmations must be memorable to be effective. You can use one word only to describe something specific. Experiment as much as you can with this to find what suits your needs the most.
Make your Affirmations Work
You got the guidelines for your affirmations. Now the tricky part of it is you. As with any change you have to be willing to improve yourself after a breakup. The best thing that will make your affirmations even more efficient is to make a checklist and a deadline. Every start is difficult, but just begin and that alone will motivate you further down the road. Write your goals on paper and make some copies of it so you can be reminded on any occasion. Make your new obligations so that your mind is focused on it. Deadlines can also specify your goal even further. The change will take some time but you have to add a timeframe for it.
Over a couple of weeks, you will regain control of your life and you will definitely start to feel better. Use your affirmations every morning and right before going to bed. Achieving your goals will give you a great boost to your self esteem and you will be more positive towards life. Do your chosen affirmations for 2-3 weeks at a specific time to become a habit. Don’t skip a day. It takes time to change your beliefs and mind pattern but once you do, there is no stopping you to improving yourself.
Enjoy your life to the fullest. Once you feel comfortable leave the comfort zone. Gain new life experiences and do things that bring you joy. Do not be so hard on yourself about that relationship. Once you truly let go of it you will be able to make your future with somebody else.
Thanks for reading, have a nice day and take care.
